At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize