We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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