But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
