I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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