Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
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