You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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