I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
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