He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
