i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
