OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Brb crying the tears of my youth
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