Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
