I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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