Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Randomize
