Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
