so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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