I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Randomize
