it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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