first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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