If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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