Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
