I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
