are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
