Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize