drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
