maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
