There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Shame - the story of my life.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
