North Korea, Best Korea!
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Randomize