Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
