I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
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