my room smells like sperm. sweet.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Randomize
