we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
