What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
