All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
What changed your mind?
Being sober
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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