there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
