Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
You ruined the universe
Randomize
