Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
My pussy is not your playground.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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