my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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