its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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