There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize