at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
