he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
