So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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