I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
