I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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