Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
