I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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