Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I am available for nakedness
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize