Soap is not a condiment
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
