Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
