well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Michael Bay diarrhea
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
